After the abrupt retirement of beloved drum rocktopus Tim “Herb” Alexander, veteran alt-metal oddballs Primus held open auditions for a new sticksman, combing through more than 6,000 videos and an untold number of dudes attempting the triple-bounce kick pattern from “John The Fisherman.” In February, the winner of the “Interstellar Drum Derby” was revealed to be 45-year-old John Hoffman, a …